So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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