Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
