Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.