In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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