My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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