We're facebook friends in real life
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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