Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
