There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
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I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
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It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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