she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
he fucked my hip out of place.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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