Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize
