I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
