So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
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Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
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Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand