she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
