That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
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