trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
