there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Randomize