So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I'm sobbing to NWA
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
