yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
