Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
