yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
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i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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