so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
