Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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