Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize