End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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