My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
