just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just google imaged poop.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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