you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
