dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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