You can't motorboat a personality
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i think i have two assholes
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
