I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize