Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
