did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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