Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
