Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
