Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete

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(408): View more from California

Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something

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(770): View more from Georgia

I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(209): View more from California

Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something

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(727): View more from Florida

it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...

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(567): View more from Ohio

I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.

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(516): View more from New York

I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder

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(513): View more from Ohio

She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that

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