how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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