Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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