it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
