Your mouth is God's brothel.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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