Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.

  (1-302): View more from Delaware

  you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace. (1-302): you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING. http://tfl.nu/vhdb
  Replies (47) Good night (732) Bad night (2346)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo (918): Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought http://tfl.nu/a8il
  Replies (33) Good night (1218) Bad night (2116)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok. http://tfl.nu/zi5p
  Replies (7) Good night (716) Bad night (3138)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass. http://tfl.nu/z3do
  Replies (12) Good night (3259) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): 4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84. http://tfl.nu/2w31
  Replies (35) Good night (5612) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea http://tfl.nu/jqzl
  Replies (10) Good night (738) Bad night (3867)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  I like it rough

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right? (1-402): I like it rough http://tfl.nu/uqsl
  Replies (38) Good night (6763) Bad night (1607)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?" http://tfl.nu/o8h0
  Replies (9) Good night (5109) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk http://tfl.nu/90hq
  Replies (7) Good night (1250) Bad night (2837)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away. http://tfl.nu/7b3j
  Replies (6) Good night (3384) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face http://tfl.nu/knsv
  Replies (25) Good night (3526) Bad night (1831)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all. http://tfl.nu/v9t7
  Replies (6) Good night (2935) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore. http://tfl.nu/z28x
  Replies (4) Good night (1090) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us" http://tfl.nu/ho4p
  Replies (3) Good night (1371) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after http://tfl.nu/sq85
  Replies (5) Good night (249) Bad night (704)

Randomize