i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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