Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  You guys coming?

  (1-805): View more from California

  We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure

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  (805): You guys coming? (1-805): We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure http://tfl.nu/72j4
  Replies (4) Good night (1958) Bad night (566)
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  (516): View more from New York

  i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times

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  (516): i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times http://tfl.nu/hu9z
  Replies (30) Good night (674) Bad night (3081)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...

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  (703): something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas... http://tfl.nu/emnc
  Replies (18) Good night (1024) Bad night (7577)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator

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  (401): so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator http://tfl.nu/bvrd
  Replies (42) Good night (921) Bad night (7377)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?

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  (615): How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"? http://tfl.nu/jnls
  Replies (20) Good night (1537) Bad night (5747)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.

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  (814): What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners." (423): Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A. (814): No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay. http://tfl.nu/o5wb
  Replies (24) Good night (9733) Bad night (1512)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.

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  (281): that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms. http://tfl.nu/qnq5
  Replies (18) Good night (1975) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.

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  (423): It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling. http://tfl.nu/7h2p
  Replies (4) Good night (597) Bad night (1353)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.

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  (717): i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer. http://tfl.nu/4jv5
  Replies (11) Good night (1883) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.

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  (415): The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican. http://tfl.nu/ke0b
  Replies (9) Good night (1349) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING

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  (907): ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING http://tfl.nu/zq26
  Replies (7) Good night (1238) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.

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  (785): Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want. http://tfl.nu/2jiy
  Replies (3) Good night (978) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.

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  (915): He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise. http://tfl.nu/lq6i
  Replies (7) Good night (696) Bad night (197)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too

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  (909): I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too http://tfl.nu/cqg1
  Replies (1) Good night (460) Bad night (172)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety

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  (253): I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety http://tfl.nu/z2jh
  Replies (4) Good night (535) Bad night (224)

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