Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.

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  (207): We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math. http://tfl.nu/vxcn
  Replies (85) Good night (1485) Bad night (509)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Win!

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  (334): I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender. (205): Win! http://tfl.nu/0n6n
  Replies (12) Good night (5248) Bad night (774)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit

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  (214): And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit http://tfl.nu/wkai
  Replies (55) Good night (3041) Bad night (1446)
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  (661): View more from California

  Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.

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  (661): Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed. http://tfl.nu/tpz0
  Replies (29) Good night (5159) Bad night (1239)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade

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  (563): Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade http://tfl.nu/sv7y
  Replies (63) Good night (58319) Bad night (1442)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..

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  (732): only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package.. http://tfl.nu/0izj
  Replies (37) Good night (6970) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today

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  (225): ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today http://tfl.nu/mtu3
  Replies (17) Good night (1183) Bad night (9368)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.

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  (949): The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women. http://tfl.nu/zhxo
  Replies (22) Good night (6414) Bad night (3071)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.

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  (314): Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day. http://tfl.nu/blek
  Replies (4) Good night (3166) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.

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  (678): we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole. http://tfl.nu/qa53
  Replies (9) Good night (2633) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.

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  (217): dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws. http://tfl.nu/yoz5
  Replies (5) Good night (1122) Bad night (1347)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.

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  (520): One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops. http://tfl.nu/4y8e
  Replies (10) Good night (2004) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?

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  (703): I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK? http://tfl.nu/mw9u
  Replies (16) Good night (516) Bad night (2098)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.

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  (920): I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister. http://tfl.nu/n0zu
  Replies (11) Good night (1080) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY

  (618): View more from Illinois

  CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  The D is nonnegotable.

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  (952): FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY (618): CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3? (952): The D is nonnegotable. http://tfl.nu/i957
  Replies (4) Good night (903) Bad night (251)

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