there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I didn't notice because vodka
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
