Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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