I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You can't special order awesome
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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