i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
