Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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