Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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