We won't sleep together?
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
