Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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